Emo Mood Swings and that F*c*ing Thing called LIFE!

Feel like sh*t and like a dumpster, well it’s a hellm, everyday’s a hell. I always wanted to be the guy who has the answer when you can find any answer at all to this miserable life but now i cant and i am looking one for myself…Done with things that i got to do, then “what’s next”, its been a while that i have been looking for meanings life meanings and reason to rationalize what is happening to this damn called life.
Heck i am in a mild depression as self diagnosed but whatever this depression is it is still a depression. You may wonder why i am in angst or to whom is the cause of this rants. Well it’s life and all else realted to it. And I hate it, my way of life now sucks. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TO HELL WITH IT!!!!!!!!!!!DAMN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Staying a float

I had been miserable, i am regressing and going in to my shell on what i call my safezone. well it’s better this way, than not to get by everyday. Life is tough and if i give up, i could never know what is beyond but as of this moment i want to find security before i go on again and try. Well as always God is good and i thanks for the reason of that i wake up everyday.


Am all exhausted for today. I finished a selective backup script on bash command. Fixed what i got to fix.Done what i have to do. But still why i am not happy or releived of what i have done for today. Heck i can only say i am miserable. Yeah sure if i will look on what i have, i have everything. But since being alone was good. What i had kept for such a long time creeps up slowly on me and it’s brimming with one wrong move i’ll drown.Yeah reality is i am a loner, with friends, yes…still i am a loner..

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